An Open Letter to Morgan Wallen’s Dog, Boots.
Boots,
We need ya.
Best I can tell you became Morgan Wallen’s dog a couple years ago. And what a couple of years it’s been! Your owner has been cancelled for using a racial slur, was the best-selling artist across all genres last year selling 3.2 Million units, was the on and off again musical guest on Saturday Night Live, and now is finally back on the road headlining a sold out tour. Oh, and right about the time he decided to get a dog, he was arrested for public intoxication after being tossed out of Kid Rock’s honky tonk in Nashville.
It was probably worth it for the mug shot.
Also is there anything more country than getting tossed out of Kid Rock’s honky tonk? That’s like lettering in country music. Heck, all conference.
To be fair, your master, Mr. Wallen, has worn a warning label for the last couple years like a sash on a pageant queen. It’s right there on his guitar strap, and the cover of his best-selling double album—DANGEROUS.
And that’s precisely why I’m writing you, Boots. Because Morgan is dangerous, but more importantly, he’s about to arrive at a crossroads, and we’d like your help pulling him on a leash down the right path.
I was lucky enough to attend opening night of Wallen’s tour at Madison Square Garden in Manhattan this month, and after watching the show it’s clear he’s equal parts Stone Cold Steve Austin and George Strait. On one hand, Wallen is the modern country outlaw, a f*ck boy happy to run around the stage on his toes fist pumping and shot gunning beers with opening act HARDY before whipping the empty cans into the crowd like split fingered fastballs. Wallen ended his set with a defiant scream to his adoring crowd, “I ain’t going nowhere, and neither are you!”
On the other hand, Wallen is an absolute country music hit machine with the rare ability of consistently delivering songs that will stand the test of time. Perhaps the most important artist that Nashville has seen in over a decade, Wallen writes his own songs. He writes hits. And he writes a ton of them. And unlike the straw hat, new country stars —Wallen isn’t talk-singing his way onto your pontoon. Nope, Morgan Wallen has real chops. Don’t believe it, watch the intro to his current tour where he plays “Sand on my Boots” alone on piano (skip to the 3:55 mark on the clip below). Or listen to all thirty tracks on Dangerous, because twenty-five of them might be hits. It’s unprecedented, and Nashville knows it.
Boots, the truth is we don’t know what the full potential of your owner is. George Strait is an icon. But Wallen’s Dangerous album proves he has vocal chops like Tim McGraw, an emerging song writing craft like Chris Stapleton or Luke Combs, and outlaw tendencies like Waylon and Willie. Not a terrible recipe.
This is where you come in, Boots. We have 3 things we’d like your help to keep reminding your master, Morgan, as he carries the hopes and dreams of country music on his shoulders as they peek out of his sleeveless flannel.
1) KEEP IT ABOUT THE MUSIC, BECAUSE IT’S THAT GOOD.
In the corners of Madison Square Garden on opening night, there were several attempts to turn the between song breaks into a political rally as “USA! USA! USA!” and “Let’s Go Brandon!” chants started up, only to fizzle.
I don’t know what side of the aisle you’re on Boots, but your owner Morgan has the talent and potential to play tent poles tall enough to fit people from both sides. Certainly, on this tour there will be people who go to the show despite some of Wallen’s recent actions. The music is so good, it demands second chances. And, sadly, there are also people going to the show because of some of Wallen’s worst behavior.
But all that should really matter is the music. Because hit machines like Morgan Wallen are a rare breed, not many have the range to span from “line ‘em up, knock ‘em back, fill em’ up” party anthems like “Whiskey Glasses” and “Up Down” to deeper fare like “Wonderin’ bout the Wind.”
But Boots, you already know Morgan is amazing. You’re his best friend. All we’re saying is with a special talent like Morgan Wallen, there’s more than enough to keep a crowd bigger than country music has seen in years chanting “One more song! One more song!” instead of some political slogan a small group is trying slap on his guitar case like a bumper sticker or graffiti artist tagging a wall. We’d just like to see Morgan use his talents to be the lightning for many, instead of being reduced to a lightning rod by the few.
2) WRITE. WRITE. WRITE.
Boots, it’s time to put that stick down and hide your bone. If you’re going to fetch anything for your best buddy Morgan, bring the man a pen because he needs to keep writing. While it’s becoming more common, it’s rare for an artist with such commercial appeal to write so much of his own music like Wallen does. Not only was his pen behind many of the countless hits on Dangerous, but he’s written hits with and for others including Jason Aldean and Ryan Hurd.
Morgan Wallen knows how to craft a song, and we need you to do everything in your power to keep him doing so. So, yes, please fetch pen after pen so Morgan keeps writing for himself, for his buddies, and for anyone else who wants a hit. It’s clear that Wallen cares about his craft and his choices. He showed us that early on choosing to cover Jason Isbell’s “Cover Me Up,” and more recently lending his vocals when his buddy Ernest wrote his own 100-year song, “Flower Shop.”
Yes, Boots, bring Morgan pens, pencils, markers, crayons. Whatever you can get your paws on to make sure he keeps writing. And if you happen to see producer David Cobb at the dog park, maybe hump his leg until Morgan comes over and meets him. Because if Morgan keeps growing as a songwriter it won’t be long before he’s writing every song he sings, including hits as infectious as the Blake Pendergrass and John Byron penned “865,” a ballad with the power to mint a whole new generation of country fans. If “865” ever gets radio play, it may stay on top of the charts for that many days.
Yes, Boots, keep fetching those pens and Morgan will have a discography of his own chalk full of timeless tracks like Isbell’s “Cover Me Up.” And at the rate he’s going, he’ll do it “before the magnolias bloom.”
3) GROW UP, BUT STAY COUNTRY.
So why write a letter to Morgan Wallen’s dog? Why entrust this important missive to a two-year-old German shepherd? I mean, technically you’re still a puppy.
Let me say this as simply as I can. While your owner may indeed have the talent to be around for decades of hit making, he’s also shown us he could just as easily burn out as fast as a firework. Selfishly we’d like to see Morgan playing State Fairs twenty years from now when he’s old enough for his belt buckles to dig into his beer belly. But we also know, if he doesn’t make the right choices, he could just as easily have the shelf life of Billy Ray Cyrus, reduced to a punchline and a cartoon in a sleeveless flannel on the next Family Guy.
Artists don’t get much more country than Morgan Wallen. A quick glance at the 30 tracks on Dangerous, and you can see 22 mention drinking, 7 mention trucks, and 6 talk about fishing. With numbers like that, it’s easy to see why Wallen appeals to “the Southern drawl crowd” as he says on another one of his ear worms, “Still Goin’ Down.”
But Boots, guess how many songs on the Dangerous double album mention a dogs? Zero. Zilch. Not a one.
We know, we know. You were brand new when Morgan was writing Dangerous, and he didn’t have a chance to write about his new best friend. But consider this article our plea that you do your part to make sure he eventually does. Because we want to hear what Morgan Wallen has to say in the future. When he falls in love, starts a family, and, yes, is just hanging out with his dog. We want this hit machine to be making music for many years to come. Country music that can fill stadiums, change car rides, and make new fans out of the folks who say they like “everything but country.”
And the only person who can get in the way of that happening is, well, Morgan Wallen.
So Boots, we’re just asking you to do your part. Keep your eye on Morgan. Don’t let him make a fool out of us. Make him take you fishing. Pull him down the right side of the road, and maybe, every once in a while chew up his flannel so he stays home for a night or two. Teach “the boy from East Tennessee” how to Netflix and chill.
Besides the lyrics to “Livin’ the Dream” would seem to indicate Morgan knows he’ll need more nights at home with his dog if he’s going to go the distance as a singer songwriter, “People would kill to be me . . .But y’all, it ain’t as good as it seems, this livin’ the dream is killin’ me.” So, keep on pulling that leash on the right side of the path. We’re counting on you, Boots. Good luck, it’s not going to be easy.
