The Miami Grand Prix: Red Necks Are More Fun Than Rich People.
We’ve all seen one before. That guy at the bar that wears his pants so you can see the sunshine and gets that special breed of can’t-remember-if-I-am-a-packer-fan-or-viking-fan drunk. Red necks are a huge nuisance at hockey games, bars and anywhere you would find a stereotypical “true American” at.
Races are a huge part of American “red neck” culture. Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights showed us how Wonder Bread, half-naked women and a beer gut fit perfectly with racecars. NASCAR has long been a beloved event for Americans to indulge in fast cars without getting pulled over. So, as I headed to the Miami Grand Prix Formula 1 (F1) race, I was prepped to see these “true Americans” red necks everywhere.
I was met with something far worse—rich people.
F1 is an international racing league, for open-wheel single-seater formula racing, primarily for European audiences. If NASCAR has Ricky Bobby (and the 8 pound 6 ounce newborn infant baby Jesus), F1 is more Bond, James Bond. Currently while there are no American F1 drivers, it has attracted quite the American fan base with the help of Netflix’s hit docuseries Drive to Survive. So, when Miami was set to be the location for one of a series of races in the 2022 Formula One World Championship, people were rightfully hype.
The catch—the cost for attending this F1 weekend went for a pretty penny. While I was lucky enough to get a ticket for nothing, others paid upwards of $1,200 for general admission, meaning just getting to walk around the campus and track surrounding the Miami Dolphin’s Hard Rock Stadium. For the true F1 VIPs, a fake marina in the middle of the track held people who had to pay upwards of $10,000 each.
Now of course to us Midwesterners, $10,000 on a single ticket is outrageous as there are so many better ways to spend that kind of money. But for rich people—specifically Europeans—F1 is the perfect way to indulge for a weekend.
The weather in Miami was scorching hot and for someone used to Minnesota’s 10-month winters, I struggled to keep up with Florida’s custom cocktail of humidity mixed with burning rubber. For the rich people, the weather was no match for their covered VIP sections equipped with turning fans.
Standing just below these VIP clubs, I imagined the rich people looking down their noses at us like the people with fast passes at Disney as they skip the 2-hours lines, “Ugh, poor people.”
What was even better, was getting to see all of the high-end fashion designers people were sporting in the 90 degree heat. I saw Christian Dior shoes, Ferrari jumpsuits and Rolexes for days. Our group dressed for comfort and for the weather, wearing tennis shoes and shorts. Our comfort-over-style choice didn’t impress many people around us. I mean if you’re already in VIP, do you really need those Christian Louboutin heels to peer over people?
My next favorite thing about these rich people racing fans is their inability to look like they are having a good time in the numerous amounts of photos they need to take. You’re at the first F1 race in Miami, and you can’t bear to flash some teeth? I mostly witnessed women decked-out head-to-toe in Gucci and Prada pursing their lips next to a man that looks like he’s a famous soccer player with a blank expression on his perfectly matte face. Also, does having a net worth over seven figures mean you don’t sweat anymore. . .asking for a friend.
Comparing rich race fans with red necks seems ridiculous, but they are two groups of people that can be a nuisance at a sporting event. However, I will say, I have a better appreciation for red necks now that I’ve experienced the opposite end of the spectrum. While yes, they may chain smoke cigarettes, sweat Miller Lite, and wear jean shorts—one thing about red necks is they’re always there for a good time.
Albeit the Miami Grand Prix’s price point no doubt invited those in a different tax bracket than I, being there made me feel a little out of place. Being surrounded by rich people made me feel shameful dressing for the weather. Not to mention it felt like a lot of these rich people race fans were at the race for the wrong reasons. They were there because of the grandiose nature of the sport and the symbol of being in a VIP racing club at THE event of the weekend in Miami. It was more about flexing their Ferrari jump suit, or getting the perfect selfie at the right sponsored lounge, than it was about taking in the experience and being in the moment. Fun and smiles were out of the question for these rich people race fans, whereas red necks would have no issue putting their arm around a stranger, or doling out a high-five when their favorite driver wins the race. (Or they think their favorite driver won the race).
In all seriousness, the F1 race, even though it was referenced as Fyre Festival 2.0 by a Daily Mail article, was an incredible event. I’ve never seen racing in person before, let alone vehicles as fast as the F1 cars. Getting to see people represented from all over the globe and hearing those around us, despite the heat, cheer and share their excitement for racing is something special that doesn’t come around often.
But it was also a nice reminder that in a world where everyone is craving belonging, the cold and clammy indifference of rich people that make you feel invisible, is far worse than the red neck who pulls you into their sweaty armpit or spills a beer on you. At least the red necks are there for the party.
