The Green Scrunchie: Best Hair From The Masters.

Even in November, there is nothing quite like the Masters. Jim Nance’s voice, and that soothing piano soundtrack. It’s as close as major sports gets to drawing you a bath, or selling you a Norah Jones CD at a Starbucks. There’s nothing quite like falling in and out of sleep watching golf, and the Masters takes the cake. 

A few holes into this weekend’s tournament I was still awake, and realized that unlike hockey, golf is follicle challenged. All you need to do is watch someone finish their round, and take off their hat for the handshake to see that Augusta is a long way away from Hairmantown.  

But there were some diamonds in the rough, sorry . . .second cut. Yes, we had 63-year-old Bernard “Longhair” defying the odds with his Brady Bunch curls. And while it wasn’t Tommy Fleetwood’s best weekend of golf, his hair is the most consistent on the tour. But it was Australia’s Cameron Smith who stole the show with the Bloomin’ Onion he had marinating on his upper lip. Turns out Cam is a chip off the old Ayers Rock, as he appears to be learning from his caddie (and salad Sherpa) Matthew Tritton. But despite a stacked leaderboard, it would be Abraham Ancer that would put on the green scrunchie for best hair at the Masters this year. It’s not that often a guy’s hair and strut down the fairway makes you wish you owned tighter pants. I may have to send the wife out for a pair of 36x32s this week to celebrate. 

It’s not hockey, but it was something. Finally, a warning: when watching the Green Scrunchie video, do not stare directly into Cameron Smith’s golden brown Bloomin’ Onion mustache unless you use one of those solar eclipse dioramas.

Watch the video below. Enjoy!